This question was posed to me by my dear friend Heather. She’s one of those amazing people you really want to be around. She’s magnetic, charming, beautiful, insightful and thrives on getting real.
We were put in each other’s paths when our firstborns were infants, you know, when you’re clinging to every ounce of your pre-mom self before you realize everything has changed, forever.
We found each other in a breastfeeding support group, felt that magnetic pull, and have been buddies throughout the past 11 years and throughout the miles that now separate us. She has numerous titles, but one title that sums her up is healer. Thank goodness for people like Heather.
So when she posed this question about the body, mind and spirit connection to me, I heeded the call and headed into the depths of introspection.
Have you ever met someone who has succeeded in creating balance in their life?
It’s hard to imagine, but easier to imagine if represented by a cairn. Have you ever seen someone create those stacks of rocks called cairns? What makes them cool is that we can see and feel how we as humans have an insatiable curiosity to create balance?
We seek to make sense in an otherwise chaotic world. This can be observed as one tries to create balance out of objects that are mostly rounded edges, like rocks. Our lives are similar, don’t you think?
So, how do I create a balanced life, physically, mentally and emotionally?
I decided to think of it this way:
- How do I create my body mind spirit cairn?
- Which rocks represent body?
- Which represent mind?
- Which represent spirit?
- Which are on the bottom, as my foundation?
- Which are there more of?
- Which is on the top, for passersby to see?
- Upon what does my cairn sit?
- Can my cairn withstand the weather?
- If it topples, how do I rebuild it?
It’s funny how life whispers answers into our ears but sometimes we’re not quite ready to hear them.
How Would It Feel to Wake Up with Inspiring Self-Love Motivation Every Day?
To answer Heather’s question, what does it mean to be balanced in body, mind and spirit, I’m finding my answers in a period of deep rest.
I ignored the whispers for just a tad too long and landed in ill-health, in pain, in an inflammatory state and bone-tired.
Not only was I diagnosed with Rheumatod Arthritis at the age of 38, I also discovered a deep rooted viral infection that had been hiding in my body for likely years on end.
I needed to be reminded that rest and recovery is essential to my well-being, and I deserve it; in fact my well-being depended on it. Today, taking care of my body is my foundation, the biggest rock in my cairn.
What does this mean for me?
First of all, I SLOW DOWN.
I’m one of those people who like to have all of my boxes checked at the end of the day (ok, just say it…perfectionist). I literally had to STOP and make time to rest, and let the daily chores of life just WAIT. My laundry isn’t folded at the end of the day, my kids’ rooms aren’t clean, and I stopped making dinner every *single* night. You know how hard it is to walk by the same toy for days on end, left in the same spot, and not pick it up?
I just had to stop making myself sick with my perfectionism.
I nap when the toddler naps. I allow my body to rest and recover. I see my chiropractor regularly, allow myself time for massage, and relish in acupuncture.
As I make time for myself and my rest, I literally see the world as a brighter place. It’s like someone turned on the technicolor or photoshopped my world. Colors are brighter, crisper. I didn’t even realize what I had been missing.
It’s an awesome change, to be moving towards health again.
I learned that physical pain is tightly connected with emotional, spiritual, and mental wellness. They are all interconnected. I needed to be reminded that rest and recovery is essential to my well-being, and I deserve it. Today, taking care of my body is my foundation, the biggest rock in my cairn.
As I build my cairn higher, and trust in its balance, I focus on spirit.
It’s my relationships that feed my spirit and that’s never more true than when I was staring prolonged physical pain in the eye. I’ve renewed my spirit’s longing to be joyful by making the conscious decision to be a friend. It doesn’t matter to whom, and it can’t be often enough.
Be a friend, be a light, reflect joy.
This also included letting go of relationships that no longer fit quite right. Building my spiritual practice is a daily journey that is uncovered in each and every relationship.
As I consider the highest rocks in my cairn, I realize they are the rocks of having a balance of mind.
My mind is my mainstay, my strength.
Thankfully I’ve learned tools to quiet my mind when it starts to make up stories about what is or isn’t true. My mind is in balance, which I use daily in my role as a doula and birth mentor. Only when we experience a balanced quiet mind can we serve others in the throes of their own quest for balance. For me, a balanced mind is a quiet mind.
Let me take Heather’s question and ask you: in your life, how are you creating balance in body, mind and spirit?
As you create your life cairn, which rocks have more weight? Do you feel balanced? What needs more attention? What will you do to create that?
About the Author
Christine Ghali is all things birth! She has been creating Mindful Birth Services since 2009 including deluxe doula care, engaging birth classes and a trusted pregnancy blog.
With a BA in Communications from University of Missouri, 1999, Christine uses her communication skills daily to connect with parents, teaching them how to communicate effectively with their birth team (their doctor or midwife), and perhaps most importantly, she teaches her moms and their partners how to communicate with and support each other during pregnancy, labor and birth.
P.S. Head on over to Christine’s doula birth classes page to read about
Birthing From Within classes and if they feel right for you.