Do you want to learn how to say no? I’ve been working on my “NO!” for 11 years. I remember when a therapist told me, “you don’t have to go back home to St Louis just because your parents are asking you to come home for the holiday.” I remember looking at her like, “WHAT?” It was the FIRST time someone had given me PERMISSION to say NO to my parents and it was 2008. I was 31 years old. I was married with 2 kids. And I was introduced to saying NO to my parents.
How to Say No to Others and YES to What You Really Want
A lot has transpired since the introduction and the reassurance that saying no to my parents was and is OK.
Using My Voice
I now use my voice. I find my no. I speak my truth.
It’s taken YEARS.
And sometimes, I still cannot feel my no until 10 minutes too late.
But at least I find it. It is so important to learn how to hear yourself. It is so important to take time to listen. Listen to those voices in your head.
- Whose voices are they?
- Are they your parents telling you NO! You cannot do this, you cannot be that, you are a disgrace, you are lazy, you are annoying??
- Are you going to let them talk to you that way?
Don’t Talk to Me Like That
NO! STOP IT! DON’T TALK TO ME LIKE THAT! DON’T TREAT ME LIKE THAT! DON’T TOUCH ME LIKE THAT!
We didn’t learn it was OK to say these things.
You Have My Permission to Say NO
I give you permission to tell your parents “no.” Even if they’re not in the room. Even if they’re dead. Even if they’re just in your head. I give you permission to tell them “NO.”
Getting Physically Sick to Avoid Saying No
One way of saying “no” to someone that you cannot say “no” to is to get sick.
- If you are sick, you cannot clean your room!
- If you are sick, you cannot go to school!
- If you are sick, you can’t do those things that they’re asking you to do that you don’t want to do.
If you’re sick, and you have dis-ease, ask yourself, to whom am I having trouble saying no??
READ MORE FROM ME
Over the years, I have been a serial learner and practitioner, taking in information about psychology, religion, spirituality, science, medicine, quantum physics, relationships, parenting, and overall, general happiness and work-life balance. I’ve been fascinated in what it takes to and have created my life of pure joy, happiness, balance and peace. It is my mission to spread what I have learned and practiced to you in ways that are simple, easy to understand AND implement. I have served people in achieving realignment in their bodies, relationships and purpose for over 20 years. If you liked this article, and you want to read more, please visit one of the links below:
- Watch my YouTube Channel: Heather Hundhausen
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- Breakthrough: If you are struggling with the issues from this article, please schedule a free consultation.
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Heather Hundhausen, a mind/body/spirit healer and facilitator, works with heart centered individuals who are ready to release their physical and emotional pain and reconnect their minds with their bodies so they can start living a life of passion and purpose. She assists people in making decisions in their lives by following their heart, mind, intuition and soul, from a place of being whole and in integrity.
With over fifteen years as a licensed massage therapist, Heather understands the connection between how someone's emotions can show up as physical pain. Using a variety of massage techniques, including neuromuscular therapy and structural realignment, she now does her ground breaking work by helping her clients to reach back through the pain and remember who they are to create wholeness and fullness.
During her years practicing traditional massage therapy, and while an intern working on her Masters Degree in Mental Health Counseling, she realized that people responded strongly when addressing their feelings and not just their thoughts. Working with this knowledge, she began to create an experiential environment for her clients, having them focus less on what they were thinking and more on what they were feeling. She discovered that when people began to release their emotions, they also released their physical pain. Heather is now passionate about helping people do just this so they hear their inner voice and then act upon their intuition so they create a new physical, mental and emotional life for themselves.
Heather’s authenticity, integrity, honor, commitment to her clients, and ability to create trust ensures that client's have a safe space to experience the exploration and release of their pain. Her clients say she is skilled at spiritual and emotional healing and is a great partner to have on the journey to contentment. As one particular client stated, “She opened my heart so the grief could emerge and then joy was able to fill that space.”
Heather is a popular speaker and workshop leader and facilitator, with one of her most popular workshops, “Connect on Purpose: Interpreting Your Body's Signals for Greater Wisdom and Empowerment” helping guide people to live their purpose, which Heather describes as “being able to take your talents and gifts and put them into action.” She is currently authoring a book and developing additional workshops, including a meditation group.
A licensed massage therapist, specializing in Thai Massage, Neuromuscular Therapy and Myo-skeletal Alignment Technique, she has a Masters Degree in Mental Health Counseling, is certified in Redirecting Children’s Behavior as a facilitator and coach.
