Have you ever tried to manifest something that you were unclear about? What happens? I’ll tell you… either nothing, or a bunch of heartache. But, here’s the thing about a bunch of heartache – it actually helps to create clarity.
Manifest … the Tiny Home of My Dreams!
I have been obsessed with the tiny home movement. So obsessed, that I have actually cut out pieces of paper representing shipping containers, queen sized beds, twin beds, cabinets, etc … and have tried designing my own tiny home!
I research the different tiny home layouts, and fantasize about getting rid of all of my stuff, and moving into my own tiny home in the woods.
And Life Happens …
Well… then, my landlord tells me that he has sold the condo I live in, and that I have a few months to find a place and move out.
What?! My youngest son, who takes forever to get comfortable with anything, just told me a week before the landlord delivered that news, that he finally started to like our new condo.
I have moved 5 times in the last 5 years. It’s starting to get ridiculous.
I have been so frustrated paying rent and needing to move, it feels like I’ve thrown away over $100K and I’m a saver, so this literally hurts me.
So, Guess What the Universe Provided Me?
A beautiful man, a yoga cowboy (for those of you who know the story) who wants to LIVE with me, and BUY a place with me.
He doesn’t want to rent.
Actually, he REFUSES to rent, for the same reason I explained earlier in another post …
It just feels like throwing money away. (Yes, yes, I know I get to “appreciate” everything, and that there is no such thing as “wasting” or “throwing away” money, especially for these wonderful, lovely places I have lived … but it still annoys me that I don’t own and that’s the point).
The Universe Is Watching!
It watches your frustration, your heartache, your irritation, your sadness AND what you want…
All of this is EMOTIONAL VIBRATION that actually CREATES what you want next!
We just watched the beautiful movie Avatar … there were many moments in that movie that something terribly SAD happened, but then PROPELLED the characters to TAKE ACTION.
That is how emotional energy works, if you let it flow.
You feel it, it moves through you, and then you take action to change it.
Manifest 101: 6 Super Important Manifestation Steps for Couples
Mike and I are trying to manifest a piece of property together.
MANIFESTING TOGETHER AS A COUPLE is a NEW thing for me.
Manifesting is an emotional, ENERGETIC experience. And now, there are 2 sets of EMOTIONS and ENERGIES creating, not just one.
When MANIFESTING ALONE, I want to make sure I have the first THREE element covered… but when MANIFESTING TOGETHER AS A COUPLE, there are three more steps that need to be addressed.
#1 Focus
What you focus on expands.
What you focus on expands. Click To Tweet
The first part of manifestation is making sure you are TOTALLY FOCUSED on what you want. There is NO ROOM for distraction in the thoughts or emotions around the THING that you are trying to manifest.
If I say, I want to make a million dollars as a pianist, and then I never play the piano or think about the piano, or even worse, tell myself no one will ever listen to me play the piano, I am clearly not focused on my goal. I am sending the universe mixed messages.
But the tricky part is …
#2 Surrender/Release Attachment
How do you stay 100% focused on something, and release attachment to it?
Good question.
If I knew the answer, I would be a millionaire. But this is what I know.
I always get the first parking spot. (Well, almost always. I have learned that the days I don’t get the parking spot, I am REALLY out of the flow, and it’s an indication to take some time to get back centered inside myself and with my divinity!)
But HOW do I get the first parking spot almost every time?
Because, I am TOTALLY focused on getting it. I 100% believe I will get it … and frankly, I don’t give a crap if I actually get it. I am NOT ATTACHED AT ALL to getting that parking spot. But I am 100% expectant of it. When I don’t get it, I’m like WTH?? Where’s my spot!?
This brings me to one of the most important parts of manifestation.
#3 Faith – Believe It Is Already So – Feel It Like It’s Already Real, Which Can Also Be Described as Clarity.
Let me explain.
When I am 100% SURE of what I want, there is a place within the self, maybe the ego, that says, wait, I don’t actually HAVE that …
When you get focused on what you DON’T have … you will get more of what you DON’T want.
Don’t forget, what you FOCUS ON expands.
In between that moment of KNOWING what you want and GETTING what you want is the space where FAITH resides.
Faith happens between the moment knowing what you want and getting what you want. Click To Tweet
Faith Is Believing That It is Already Here, Even Though It Clearly is Not
Faith is KNOWING you are a millionaire, even though you may have $45K credit card bills and make $45K a year.
The REALITY and the WANTING sometimes seem too far apart.
The FAITH is collapsing the 2.
(This is a huge part of my coaching process, I teach my clients how to collapse these two things and make what they want a reality – it is incredible, can shift energy, vibration and emotional states in a matter of moments, and works to course correct your manifestation path immediately).
Clarity is the 2nd part of Faith
How do you create clarity?
We touched on it when we discussed focus …
It is SEEING EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT without any alternative, negative, or contrary thoughts.
When you have a LACK of clarity – this can actually be a good thing, because your CLARITY can come from frustration!
When you DON’T KNOW what you want… you can start figuring out what you DO what.
I Want 4 Spaces in the Home.
For example …
- I don’t care if it’s a
- 2 bedroom with 2 living spaces (Like a living room and a den) or a
- 3 bedroom with a living room.
- What I DON’T want, is a 2 bedroom with the living space all jammed together in the middle.
- That’s 3 spaces.
I learned that from experience and from lack of clarity.
Mike Wants a Really Nice View. He Needs Nature.
We learned this from putting a contract down on a couple of pieces of property that had 4 spaces and no view, and another that had 3 spaces and a beautiful view!
We didn’t get either of these properties, because TOGETHER we were not CLEAR about what was important as a couple.
The universe knows… but we didn’t.
We also decided that we would “settle” on a piece of property, and then some ridiculous decisions between the mortgage company and the Homeowners prevented that one from happening. Thank you universe. The universe is always taking care of us.
3 Important Pieces of the Puzzle to Manifest Together as a Couple are ATTENTION, SHARING and CARE.
#4 – ARE YOU PAYING ATTENTION?
Attention – If you aren’t paying attention to what you partner wants, you will never be able to manifest together.
If Mike didn’t pay attention to the fact that I wanted 4 living spaces, and he is doing all of the searches for the property, we may never see anything that has 4 living spaces! We will only see wonderful views!
#5 Sharing
If I didn’t TELL him that I want 4 living spaces, or he didn’t tell me that he wants a view, how would either know?
This actually comes back to the basis of my teachings, which is self love.
If I love myself enough to care about what I want, and I am courageous enough to SHARE with my partner, and I have enough CONFIDENCE to say what I want, instead of sucking it up and living the next 7-10 years in a place I hate, stewing with resentment, then I can actually HAVE what I say I want! What an amazing concept!
#6 Caring
It’s also important for us to CARE about what the other one’s wants and needs are.
If i decided not to CARE, and instead just sat around and dreamed up what I wanted alone, I am going to end up in a relationship that stinks.
It’s important to take the time to find out what your partner wants, what their dreams and hopes and needs are, so that you can TOGETHER discuss what works for BOTH of you, so you can align to something that works for BOTH of you. Caring about the other, and listening when they share, creates the clarity you need to manifest!
So … Here’s the Best Part …
Mike’s family owns some land that we could buy a 5th wheel RV and put it on there for free – HAHHAHAHA!! There’s that tiny home. It’s on 1.5 acres of land, with horses, next to a park, with a beautiful view. It doesn’t have 4 spaces for the 4 of us … except if we get the one with a bunk room and a loft!
We will see what the universe has in store for us. For now, we are clear, we are communicating, we have seen plenty of what we DON’T want … and the universe will deliver, right on time, just like it always does.
Oh, one last thing about blaming your partner for screwing it up …
I’ve noticed that some people want to BLAME THEIR PARTNER for being the ONE that screws up the manifestation.
Just so you know, it’s thinking LIKE THAT that messes up YOUR vibration, and gives you more of THAT!
So… don’t do that.
Plus, blaming and criticizing is one of the 4 horsemen, another topic that I go into DEEP detail with for my relationship coaching clients …
Let me suffice to say, it’s a bad idea, and will destroy your marriage.
PS: One little note on complaining. Complaining is OK, but is more powerful as a request, because a request creates clarity.
Here’s the trouble with a complaint:
Sometimes your partner will hear your complaint, and try to FIX the problem for you, but may come up with a very different solution than the one that you like.
Asking for what you want and making your request, what you learned from your complaint, creates much more clarity, which we earlier learned is one of the most important pieces of of my manifest 101 experience!
Good luck manifesting!
I’ll share the pictures of our new residence as soon as I get it!
Love,
Heather
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Over the years, I have been a serial learner and practitioner, taking in information about psychology, religion, spirituality, science, medicine, quantum physics, relationships, parenting, and overall, general happiness and work-life balance. I’ve been fascinated in what it takes to and have created my life of pure joy, happiness, balance and peace. It is my mission to spread what I have learned and practiced to you in ways that are simple, easy to understand AND implement. I have served people in achieving realignment in their bodies, relationships and purpose for over 20 years. If you liked this article, and you want to read more, please visit one of the links below:
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Heather Hundhausen, a mind/body/spirit healer and facilitator, works with heart centered individuals who are ready to release their physical and emotional pain and reconnect their minds with their bodies so they can start living a life of passion and purpose. She assists people in making decisions in their lives by following their heart, mind, intuition and soul, from a place of being whole and in integrity.
With over fifteen years as a licensed massage therapist, Heather understands the connection between how someone's emotions can show up as physical pain. Using a variety of massage techniques, including neuromuscular therapy and structural realignment, she now does her ground breaking work by helping her clients to reach back through the pain and remember who they are to create wholeness and fullness.
During her years practicing traditional massage therapy, and while an intern working on her Masters Degree in Mental Health Counseling, she realized that people responded strongly when addressing their feelings and not just their thoughts. Working with this knowledge, she began to create an experiential environment for her clients, having them focus less on what they were thinking and more on what they were feeling. She discovered that when people began to release their emotions, they also released their physical pain. Heather is now passionate about helping people do just this so they hear their inner voice and then act upon their intuition so they create a new physical, mental and emotional life for themselves.
Heather’s authenticity, integrity, honor, commitment to her clients, and ability to create trust ensures that client's have a safe space to experience the exploration and release of their pain. Her clients say she is skilled at spiritual and emotional healing and is a great partner to have on the journey to contentment. As one particular client stated, “She opened my heart so the grief could emerge and then joy was able to fill that space.”
Heather is a popular speaker and workshop leader and facilitator, with one of her most popular workshops, “Connect on Purpose: Interpreting Your Body's Signals for Greater Wisdom and Empowerment” helping guide people to live their purpose, which Heather describes as “being able to take your talents and gifts and put them into action.” She is currently authoring a book and developing additional workshops, including a meditation group.
A licensed massage therapist, specializing in Thai Massage, Neuromuscular Therapy and Myo-skeletal Alignment Technique, she has a Masters Degree in Mental Health Counseling, is certified in Redirecting Children’s Behavior as a facilitator and coach.
