We aren’t taught in school how to build relationships. We guess at how to build relationships based on what we learned from our parents, which, as mentioned below, was probably based on conditional, behavior modification!
How to Build Relationships By Giving and Giving and Giving … Does This Sound Familiar?
It is better to GIVE than to RECEIVE – how many times have you heard this?
What is GIVING?
What is RECEIVING?
Since most of us were programmed that GIVING is BETTER… we have a hard time receiving. We believe that we should sacrifice ourselves for others. Very, many of my clients come into my office with their heart SHUT DOWN because they are AFRAID to RECEIVE LOVE!
We have even learned to shut off the love we have for ourselves! Instead of lovingly communicating with ourselves, we are hyper critical, looking for what’s not working and what we need to do better.
We project this out onto our partner!
How to Build Relationships By Loving Ourselves First
In the PREVIOUS work life balance buckets, we look at our body pain to realize where we are blocked, we learn how to control our thoughts, how to become our own LOVING parent, take care of ourselves fully, and set boundaries.
As we learn how to love and appreciate ourselves, fill up our tank first, and not allow others to abuse us, we are able to dive into healthy relationships!
We are learning how to give and receive love from ourselves, and this is the framework for learning how to give and receive it from others.
What were YOU taught about love?
Many of us were taught conditional love, and interact with those we love with manipulation, control, and conditions.
As we learn to communicate effectively, (and we meet our own personal needs first, not allow others to treat us badly), we are able to begin to express ourselves courageously and authentically to others.
We begin to lovingly, and fearlessly move in the world as ourselves, allowing others to see us, because we allow ourselves to see ourselves and be seen. This takes courage, bravery, and the willingness to connect and be intimate.
Intimacy = Into Me I See
Intimacy: I allow you to see me, and I allow myself to be seen, because I no longer feel “not good enough.”
I now love myself and know that I am worthy of love from others. And that if others do not want to give me love, that it has NOTHING to do with me. As we learn what is OUR interpretation, and how others are interpreting, we are able to hold the view of the “witness,” instead of the reactor.
READ MORE FROM ME
Over the years, I have been a serial learner and practitioner, taking in information about psychology, religion, spirituality, science, medicine, quantum physics, relationships, parenting, and overall, general happiness and work-life balance. I’ve been fascinated in what it takes to and have created my life of pure joy, happiness, balance and peace. It is my mission to spread what I have learned and practiced to you in ways that are simple, easy to understand AND implement. I have served people in achieving realignment in their bodies, relationships and purpose for over 20 years. If you liked this article and you want to read more, please visit one of the links below:
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